We come across so many different drinks names that it’s a joy to find some that stand out, and these certainly do that. Craft beers have dominated the rude names niche, whereas the wine industry tends to use them less so… but not these beauties. Let’s not forget that you’re still spending hard-earned cash on these bottles, so the wine inside has to put a smile on your face too. These 8 cheeky bottles do just that. They’re perfect for light-hearted gifts, but just make sure you know the person you’re giving them to well enough! You’ll know what we mean as we go…
Ass Kisser Shiraz
Ass Kisser, a cheekily named South Australian red, boasts 100% Shiraz grapes aged 12 months in French oak. This robust wine offers smoky, woody spices and bramble berries on the nose, while the palate delights with chocolate, spiced plums, and cherry. It’s a mischievous name, but smooth tannins and bright finish, highlighted by peppery spice and vanilla mean the wine is serious.
Size: 750ml
ABV: 13%
Find here: £11.50
Sweet Bitch Moscato Rosé Bubbly
Sweet Bitch Moscato Rosé Bubbly – now that’s a statement, and one you might want to be careful with when gifting someone. In terms of the liquid itself, there’s a lot to love here. It’s a delightful sparkling wine from Chile's Aconcagua Valley, bringing a fruity, bubbly and sweet profile that avoids being syrupy despite the ABV. The pretty silver-pink hue is matched by the crisp strawberries, applies and cherries, followed up by an orange tang. It is US only though, as far as we can tell!
Size: 750ml
ABV: 7%
Find here: $10.99
Jost 4 Skins
As seen on The Tonight Show, they definitely knew what they were doing with this one, but they do have a way out because this red Nova Scotia blend actually uses four hybrid grape varieties - Castel, Marechal Foch, Leon Millot, and Lucie Kuhlmann. This full-bodied wine boasts a rich ruby hue with aromas of dark berries and mocha and a palate of sour cherry and dried fruits. This would be great with charred or roasted dark meats.
Size: 750ml
ABV: 12%
Find here: $22.19
Fat Bastard Chenin Blanc
This is an in-your face Chenin Blanc from the sunlit vineyards of France, presenting a pale straw hue and a bouquet of lively citrus and tropical fruit notes. This wine embodies a perfect balance of freshness and vibrancy, with refreshing acidity and a crisp finish. Its juicy yellow peach and hint of vanilla complement a tangy citrus finish, making it a delightful companion for various occasions. It’s a bold and brash name, but there’s some lovely delicate character to the wine itself – a big softie.
Size: 750ml
ABV: 13%
Find here: £13.20
Fattoria Alois CUNTO Pallagrello Nero IGT
Fattoria Alois CUNTO Pallagrello Nero IGT is a concentrated Italian red wine made from the once-extinct Pallagrello grape, rediscovered in Campania. Named after the Neapolitan word for "short story," (so not anything else!), this wine offers floral aromas of violet and geranium, along with fruity and spicy notes of black pepper and juniper. With a medium structure, it features excellent tannins and a soft, enveloping flavour.
Size: 750ml
ABV: 13%
Find here: £34
Penetration Cabernet Sauvignon
Naked Winery, you have our attention. In fact, this Oregon has a cheeky lineup with other wines such as Take it Off Syrah, Foreplay Chardonnay and their Dominatrix Pinot Noir. This rich, smooth Cabernet isn't overly tannic, balancing black cherries with a smoky, barrel-toast finish. For all their light-hearted nudge and a wink names, the wine is serious, premium liquid. The nose is treated to notes of black currant, dark cherry, clove, and praline. Robust, oaky and elegant.
Size: 750ml
ABV: 14%
Find here: $45
Two Hands Sexy Beast Cabernet Sauvignon
Two Hands' Sexy Beast Cabernet Sauvignon showcases why this Australian winery excels beyond Shiraz. This vintage, scoring an impressive 90 Parker Points, offers a rich blend of blackcurrant, mocha, mint, and graphite. Its deep magenta hue complements aromas of currants, cocoa dust, lavender, and bay leaf. On the palate, it’s soft yet powerful, with gentle tannins and flavours of black plum, chocolate, and smoke, all harmoniously balanced. What a package.
Size: 750ml
ABV: 14.5%
Find here: £35.50
Neleman Just Fucking Good Wine Red
Everything is stripped back here to what is simply, well, you can read the bottle. Derrick Neleman is a biodynamic farmer cooperating with nature to bring beautiful wines to the table. No pesticides. No additives. Just healthy and balanced soils for tasty grapes. For every 175 bottles produced, they also plant a tree! On top of that, upcoming artists and designers are behind their labels and packaging. What an operation. The wine itself uses the Marselan grape, a cross between Cabernet Sauvignon and Garnacha, which is aged in French oak for over 14 months. Ripe, wild berries of all kinds, oaky vanilla and velvety tannins – it’s a simple and delicious Spanish red.
Size: 750ml
ABV: 13.5%
Find here: £20.99
If you want to surprise BBQ guests with any of these, then how about bringing out some of the food-friendly gems for the main dishes?